scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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