i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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