i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
