is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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