i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize