Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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