So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
