Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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