never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
