Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
