Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
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