me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
