I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize