Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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