We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I am full of burrito and curiosity
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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