For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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