So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize