she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
