Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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