I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
