Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
