she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
