he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
