Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
ok first of all what the fuck
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize