yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
