I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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