And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
