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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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