I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
cat food counts as protein by the way
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
you had me at cake vodka
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
