...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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