It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
