oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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