it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize