So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
