The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
