then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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