My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
