i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
