To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
