i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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