I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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