i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
