sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
