its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
