? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Randomize
