Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize