? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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