That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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