Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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