What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
