no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
